Over Christmas I sold some movies to a friend's of a friend's mom. Cute lady. In her 50's. Something like 9 kids and already a Grandma. As we made our transaction she giggled that: I have that same goose on my porch. We must be women with the same taste!

Dang Valentine's outfits are only included in the upgraded wardrobe plan from Granny Shop. I'm not that desperate at least. We will bide our time with a scarf and cap thankyouverymuch.

Lesson learned: eat your greens early! I didn't get a salad for breakfast or lunch, and decided I would make one for dinner. Then The Mister of the House came home he carried a flat box in the shape of a large square. Inside was a food Don Draper hasn't heard of.

Long story to that picture that I love love love.

By some summer miracle, this blog is getting updated. There is so much going on, I'm not quite sure where to begin, how to end, or what to expound. So now that I have a second at this way-past-bedtime shush, I thought I'd throw out a taste of Mrs. Olsen's Summer of Oh-Nine so far....


and reverence. Also curiosity, dry heaving & new theories about millenial life. Hmmmm..?


wish these were my toes darnit. Purple!

My mommy moved home from Hawaii, and my sissy got in a big jet airplane all the way across the U.S. so we could digest an Idaho sunset together. Aaaaahh.... p.s. over a foot cut off my locks and the olfactory cells reminiscing Apache Avenue when I got a perm the first time in over 15 years!

Looksie!

A Circus! Right in our neighborhood!

I haven't looked this good in a suit since Ricks College!

If anyone is reading these blurbs: Please take a guess at how much older cousin on the left is than Rainbow Girl?

Round 2 of the neighborhood circus. Notice the cat-like poise of Rainbow Girl via Tiger! Yeow!


Aaahh. For reals my only daughter got baptized and received The Gift of the Holy Ghost, and my heart nearly exploded with JOY!

...if my kid is cuter than yours. I mean, it's not like I had time to notice with this mug shadowing me around. And he's just sooo darn cute. Here is the toothy, happy, moody Buddha Baby at sixteen months.

With all the running, eating, praying, playing, yelling, crying, dreaming and thinking...you have to wonder, how are my kids processing all this and how will it all end when they're done growing? What will be their personal evolution. Let's explore our possibilities shall we? Our guinea pig? Vanilla Wafer. In desperate need of a haircut.

Here he is flashing his age, and proud to be 3.

Awwww. Nerdy cute.

The slippery sag of the shoulders, together with the feathered riptide searing the middle of his head, and his trusty crayons filling his front pocket...it's enough to make a mother glow knowing the ladies, the booze, and the bad grades will make a screeching halt upon hitting his nerdy shield.

As a plug for mother's pride and nerdy studs, I thought I'd share this pure-white rap from a skinny, brace-faced teenager who started a no-cussing club that is 30,000 strong worldwide. Mrs. Olsen is just waiting for Rainbow Girl to turn 13 so she can formally sign her up.

Here we are subscribing to the concise prescription for non-conformity. To be a unique and brazen individual, you absolutely must do the following no exceptions!: color your hair an M&M shade, look ticked, and pick up your prom date with a mohawk.

He's wearing this shirt with a sense of irony.



Oh my! Here's Mrs. Olsen back in High School in the great state of Idaho.


[leaning through the cab of his truck while at a red light on Main Street]

Meet me in your tight-arse jeans and big hair September 6th. Eastern Idaho State Fair. Blackfoot. Okay fine! I'll perm the mullet before we go. Just make sure you wear your fishnet v-neck over your pink tubie for the Def Leppard concert.

BTW, Wendy O., if you're reading this and since I just discovered you are a closet butt rocker, you will be in heaven at the Eastern Idaho State Fair. The 80's and their horrible music are still going strong there on an annual basis.

And finally...

Happy squirmy 3-year old with a freshly shorn head. For now, we'll take your wrestling, kissing, and obsession with things on wheels as long we keep getting the love. And keep getting no sass. Love you kid!

As an Idaho Girl by nature, I can appreciate the classic Sunday dinners I enjoyed every week of my young girl life: mashed potatoes, roast, glazed carrots, gravy, and green salad. Simple. Beautiful.

Bland.

Maybe it's the infiltration of asian and indian restaurants that dot the land. Maybe I'm trying to force culture through food. And maybe, just maybe, I'm trying to lure The Mister of the House away from the office and his 12+ hour workdays....

....because today I made a quadruple batch of his favorite dish Chicken Tikka Masala.

Sorry people, time to invest in some spices!

I just had to dot my fingers with the many flavors that made up this dish: cinnamon, cumin, ginger, paprika, red cayenne pepper, and black pepper. How pretty is that?

First, cut 3 breasts into tiny bite-size pieces and throw them in with this marinade for at least an hour:

Marinade
1 cup plain yogurt

1 TBL lemon juice

1 tsp ground cumin

1 tsp ground cinnamon

1 TBL minced fresh ginger

* cut this down, or out if you want it more mild. Try it!** 2 tsp cayenne pepper

2 tsp fresh ground black pepper

3 tsp salt

Now the recipe told me to skewer them and grill them. Where do they think I live, India? It's winter here, which is why I just threw them on my George Foreman Lean Mean Fat Grilling Machine. You could probably throw them in the skillet. Who cares? Just cook it about 5 minutes on each side, until juices run clear. Then set your chicken aside.

Now time for the sauce. More spices!

In a large skillet, throw in this first, saute 1 minute:

1 TBL butter

1 clove garlic, minced

1 jalapeno pepper, finely chopped*

** make sure you deseed this puppy unless you want to get an involuntary nosebleed during dinner

Into this buttery delight, throw in these spices:

2 tsp ground cumin

2 tsp paprika

more salt, to taste

coat the garlic and peppers real good

Now here's the saucy addition:

1 (8 oz) can tomato sauce

1 cup heavy cream

Simmer on low heat until sauce thickens, about 20 minutes.

Lastly:

add grilled chicken and simmer 10 more minutes.

Can you feel the love? The spice?

I can.

If I hadn't been so excited, I would have remembered to garnish it with cilantro. But doesn't it look per-ty on my batik tablecloth?

This sauce goes a looong way, it's so full of flavor. Cook up a big batch of fragrant rice, add some sides of neutralizing foods like: broccoli, fruity milky smoothie, or if you're lucky...naan bread.

5 minutes later...

What can I do with all this spice?

I just love planting a kiss into the soft skin of my offspring. Here Vanilla Wafer is getting attacked in that sweet spot: little behind the ear, little above the neck. Don't you just love that cute little shoulder cringe?

Twenty minutes a day is all her teacher asks of her. Couple of homework pages, some spelling words, and twenty minutes of reading make up the weekly schoolwork routine for Rainbow Girl. To make sure we don't lag behind on her reading requirements, it helps when you have some text that reall engages the kid, keeps them interested, excited, and anxious to turn the next page. This week, the book that has consumed my kids has been this one:

Literacy puts a whole new spin of involvement with the beloved JCPenney Toy Catalog. Rainbow Girl pored over each page and then wrote out her official "Christmas List". Here she is showing one of her favorites on the list: Microscope Mega-Screen.

It reminds me of when I was a kid. The JCPenney book was always getting stuck on the page with the two-person cars for kids. I dreamt of driving around Apache Avenue free of menacing pedal-power. The widow with the full cookie jar, Mrs. Hyde, I could drive right up to her front step and relive the glories of Halloween every day of the year. I could always count on getting some sugar from her house, along with a shoulder-wrenching hug. Mrs. Hyde, the Archibald's next door, my best friend Beth, they'd all become my #1 fans. Me and my car...I'd be the coolest kid on Apache Avenue.

So I couldn't help bust up laughing when Rainbow Girl started reading off her own Christmas List. Here's her list in all it's phonetic glory:

Pink ipod

telascop

computer

(by this time, Mrs. Olsen is laughing her head off. "Nice try kid". But wait, it gets better)

camera

Dough-Na-matic

Marshmallow Blaster

buble gum masheen

phone

Julre Box

neclise

bracelet

ring

cottin candy Masheen

electric gutar

Play Kichin

Play farm with animals

Green Dragon

Mrs. Olsen: You were just telling me all you wanted was Pet Shop stuff.

(Rainbow Girl scrambles to the list and returns with 2 more additions)

100 Pet Shops

a cat

You know, I never got that car I drooled over year after year in the JCPenney catalog. But looking back, there are no heart-breaking disappointments I can recall during my Apache Avenue Christmases. So I think Rainbow Girl will be alright not winning the kid lottery this Christmas.

Last November I gave birth to the giant of the newborn nursery. My earliest baby (by 2 weeks) and my biggest at 9 lb 4oz. Does anyone feel sorry for me?

I can't believe it's been a whole year. I'm still running around blaming my tiredness, lack of ambition, fatness, and moodiness to the fact that I "just had a baby". Guess I'll have to come up with something else now.

Here's some of Buddha Baby's faces. When you have a language barrier, then the face and the cry are all you've got to figure out what my midget is trying to say. Is midget a bad word nowadays?

Interested and in wonder. This face will last until he hears his mother's voice, or for 20 seconds, whichever is shorter.


Rico Suave says "I love boobs" I'm sorry Grandpa if you are reading this. It's true, the boy loves boobs. It's a food thing.

Mildly entertained face will last until he sees his mother leave the room to go to the bathroom, and then he freaks out. He's my midget-stalker.

Mrs. Olsen's favorite face is this one. It's a combination of the nose scrunch, the lip curl, and the spaced out teeth. This is Buddha Baby excited and happy. He is saying "That's funny! Me likey!"

In Grand Olsen Tradition, we gave Buddha Baby his very own birthday cake for his number one. The Mister of the House still hasn't forgiven me for giving Rainbow Girl a sugar-free applesauce cake for her numero uno, and so required this cake to be full of sugar, carbs, and fat. Oh, and lots of gooey gooey frosting made with sugar, carbs, and fat.

Sorry about the picture quality. Here is in on his blanket, alone, and wondering why a crowd of adults are all staring at him and singing Happy Birthday.

Enter cake and his little hand quickly reaches out to investigate. The overwhelmed tears began about 2 seconds later. He did NOT like this gooey stuff on his hands, and wanted nothing to do with the cake.

Five minutes later: we tried to coax him to love the cake by breaking off pieces and feeding to him. Then we put him in a high chair to see if that would help him reach our lofty parenting goal: to be addicted to sugar, carbs, and fat at a very young age so he can be part of the great American pasttime called obesity.

Thank you family for celebrating with us. Happy Birthday Buddha Baby, we love you and all your little quirks.